In the wake of the Supreme Court's decision to uphold Prop 8, I decided to pull out this old post and dust it off. I'm truly saddened about today's news and frankly embarrassed to live in California. Whether you agree or disagree that "marriage" should be for everyone, just know that now, because of this ruling, people who are 100% committed to each other will not receive the same rights as you or I, given the message that they're freedoms and rights are not as important because they love someone of the same sex. And for that, I'm sorry.
November 2, 2008:
I've never been a political person. I'm not the most savvy when it comes to the election and I consider myself an Independent who leans to the left. And I would never use a forum like a blog to push my own political beliefs.
I've had it easy. I'm a freckle-faced red(ish) head who has lived during a time where women and minorities have always had the right to vote. I've never faced a day of racism and any sexism aimed in my direction, I've pushed it aside knowing it was just coming from a closed-minded ignorant fool. I haven't suffered at the hands of another human being, nevermind group of people who hated me just for the color of my skin or my beliefs. While being my beautiful Asian daughter Lucy's mom for the past eight weeks has given me the tiniest glimpse of racism, ignorance and bigotry -- I would never for a second try to say I've experienced anything as hateful and hurtful as those who face it every single day of their lives.
Can you imagine a time where women were totally disregarded and told their vote didn't count? Can you really understand what it would feel like to be beaten -- even killed -- for how you look? I find it hard to even fathom.
California and Massachusetts recently gave gay people the right to marry -- that includes not being tossed out of a hospital room when that one person they've devoted their life to is breathing their last breath, being protected with health insurance, or being able to enjoy the same pride -- committed to one human being for the rest of their lives. That means they receive the same rights we do as straight married couples. Some think that allowing this abomination is dragging marriage down and want to abolish these rights with Proposition 8. I wonder -- isn't a 60% divorce rate really what's destroying the constitution of marriage? How many of those people who want to stop gay marriage are divorced themselves? And how does the marriage of another couple really affect us?
And let's face it. People have been gay since the beginning of time. It's not new, we just live in an era where more and more have the strength and support to live their lives and be proud. Do you have any idea what it's like to face the decision every day to either keep silent or be discriminated against? I know I don't. To have the courage to stay true to oneself in a world where there's so much hatred and lack of understanding should encourage us all to stand our ground in the face of adversity.
But what about the kids?
There are ads all over TV in California that evoke fear that gay marriage will be taught in schools. First of all, no... it won't. It's just propaganda pushed by people who refuse to put themselves in the shoes of others. Were any of us even taught about marriage at all growing up? Secondly, who cares? My kids have lived their short lives playing, celebrating holidays, and loving our gay friends. It's never even been a question for them. In fact, the gay couples in our lives have always been a constant; living together in committed, loving relationships -- some even raising a family -- while a few of the heterosexual couples have split and found new mates.
It wasn't all that long ago when some people thought the idea of blacks and women voting was asinine. Today, while some may still feel that way -- because you know they're always out there -- we are all given the same rights. The world changes... and happy and emotionally healthy people open their hearts and minds and change with it. I'm not saying it's always easy and comfortable to do so... but no matter your religion, race or sex, let's try to show compassion for each other.
I welcome all comments both for and against this position but please, be respectful of others.